Lessons from Your Exes

I like to think that all of the heartache I suffered and all of the seasons of life I spent in the wrong relationships still had value. I find that value when I seek the lesson in those relationships. We learn from our mistakes, right? Because if we don’t, history will repeat itself.

In no particular order…

I’m not the kind of girl that drops everything to make my life revolve around a guy. That might be one lesson I didn’t have to learn the hard way. But apparently, this ex hadn’t encountered someone who didn’t subscribe to BAE-logic. I have other interests that don’t involve you and people in my life that aren’t you. And that didn’t go over well.

And it was because I didn’t drop everything for him. And I won’t apologize for that. But, there is a lesson in self-awareness here: quality time is not my love language. And until or unless I showed him love in a way he could understand in his love language, it wasn’t going to work out. Spoiler: it didn’t work out.

There’s also something to be said for priorities. I won’t say that my priorities in the relationship were right or wrong. But know what your priorities are so that you don’t confuse them for someone else’s priorities once you’re love drunk.

I knew in the depths of my soul that I was being cheated on. The signs were there and the writing was on the wall. But, I chose to accept the bullshit that this joker was telling me. Fast forward and the relationship ended for other reasons. Ultimately I later found out that I was right. But that was after a lot of wasted time. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it’s probably a duck. I should have trusted my gut.

New rule: Only date someone that can teach you something. You have goals and aspirations, right? Things you want to learn and know? Then you should expect the same thing in a partner. Seek out someone that has their own thing going for them that…

Related posts:

Using WaitGroups in Golang with example.

This week I want to go back to the roots of my weekly blog posts and go over one of the LeetCode problems. I am doing that not because I have no other things to talk about, I have some more…